I feel I’ve been a little negative up to this point and that all is bad. My reality is that my life is extremely complicated and difficult, but because of this, when I get a moment of positivity and human caring or love, I feel it a million times more than the average person. Perhaps love comes my way all the time? I sure don’t recognize it. I often feel like a person that has never left an impression on anyone and that I’m completely unloveable and forgettable.
A couple days ago, these two beautiful dolls arrived in the mail from across the Atlantic. They were made by a woman I met in a facebook group dedicated to people with chronic illnesses that use all sorts of creativity to manage illness. Anyway, I saw her dolls posted and asked her to make me one. Within just a couple weeks, these two beautiful girls arrived at my home. She had taken such care in making them and even wrapped them up so cute. It felt great to receive love from thousands of miles away.
This evening, an old student I worked with at Job Corps called as she was in some distress. I was honored and awed that she chose ME to call during such a hard time!
And just now, a woman I have never met, but have a connection of trauma, sent me an inspirational video to watch for reasons I’m not clear. The point is, she contacted ME!
So as I speak of so much loss for trying to become the authentic me, there are also huge gains. I’m meeting and connecting with people who are genuinely interested in getting to know me. They are not so interested in what I can do for them, but they want to know me. Some want to help me. Some still need my help. Some just want to show amazing acts of kindness. All I can say is that these little gestures are proving that I AM a person to remember and a person to love! Thank goodness. I was starting to feel so lost.